Frack or Fight

 I'm only happy when it rains. I know how to deal with energy or with conflict, but I don't know how to deal with the quiet. I usually feel like the calm happens when forces are gathering somewhere that's else, so I need to use that time to gear up for a fight. Best case, I'll be bored off my ass when things are not exploding. 

I don't think of myself as a drama queen, but I'm comfortable with drama. I know what to do and how to handle it...run away, find something to hit, or hunker down and pray for dawn. Those things are simple, it's easy to figure out how to do them, and it's clear when it's time to stop. I know what to do when things are bad, but when things are quiet, I'm on high alert waiting for them to go to shit. My body's waiting for something to fight, and it can't take being in that state for too very long. I'll usually go out and find something to hit. 

I'll totally try and deny it, but there are only two ways I deal with people. If I can't force a situation into one of those places, I'll probably get distracted and just wander away. I hate the point when that wicked energy fades, and I don't know how people deal with it being gone. I know it's supposed to be replaced with something else, and I know that it's supposed to be *mature* to want that something else, but I just don't. I want to frack or fight...when those are gone, I don't know what to do.